13

I am not typically superstitious, but I would say the 13th had its way with us this weekend.  Two of the worst happenings I can not even mention in a public setting, but you can trust me when I say they took it out of me.  Third, we found out that its true...our computer is toast.  That means I lost about 10,000 pictures and all of mine and Dustin's school work.  Fourth, the furnace quit on the coldest day we had had this year.  Fifth, I wrecked the car--my first car accident ever.  I always thought it would be fun to race a car, but as I did a 180 in the highway at 45 mph, I decided that I prefer slow drives on a dirt road to anything fast and spinny.  Sixth, my childhood pet died.  Daisy was sixteen years old and my mom's faithful companion.  My mom has this way of making pets sort of people-like, so its fairly accurate to say that Daisy was a kind of "sister" to me.

We ended the weekend with a birthday celebration for my grandpa, which helped me put things into perspective.  Kids running like crazy, fits galore when candy was denied, playful shouts from the basement toy room,  and enough food to feed an army makes for a great gathering to honor Pa.  If "all's well that ends well" then all. is. well.  I have a  new computer, the house is warm again,  I was unharmed in what could have been a tragic car accident, and Daisy's life as a dog was long and meaningful.

Happy 83rd Birthday Pa!!  

God-willing

Have I mentioned before that I'm still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up?  Maybe a better way to say that would be that I'm now grown up and trying to figure out HOW to do what I want to be!!  I am a college drop out.  I got married young.  I have been pregnant for most of the past thirteen years.  In the eyes and mind of many, I put the cart before the horse and now I'm paying the price.  I am reading a book that has an excellent excellent quote that I've been thinking about for several days, "It seems as many of us grow older, we come to find out which passions faded away because they were birthed out of our humanity, while what has remained may be a confirmation that it was birthed within our spirits". (from Writings From Outside the Camp by Fred London)  Its so true.  I can't imagine what I must have been thinking as an 18 year old graduating from high school.  Its no wonder I quit college!  If I wonder now about my life, my gifts, my callings at 34 years old, how much more clueless was I then?  Thankfully, as I have grown older I have discovered more about myself.  The problem now is how to make it happen while caring for a young family who need my devotion of time and attention.  I have recently enrolled in school to finish my basic degree that I started fifteen years ago, and God-willing I will finish this time in about a year.   Beyond that I want to study midwifery.  I dream of being stealthy and strong like the Hebrew midwives.  I imagine catching babies in mud huts in West Africa and on thatch floors in southeast Asia.  I follow a blog:  midwife4jesus.blogspot.com that I often have to stop reading for the weight of compassion and prayer I feel for this woman.  It makes me dizzy trying to figure out how this will happen.  Part of the problem is that I lack patience.   I am resolving (or at least attempting to resolve) to rest and to be all here-- where I am right now...to be a faithful and present mother to my children, and in time I believe these other dreams will work themselves out.  God-willing.

A Look Back at the Highlights

Five months later...I'm back!!  I tried to just let it go, but I can't seem to continue on into the new year until I've done a proper year end review of 2011.  I'll start by saying that my resolution for 2011 was that I would keep my room clean.  I really really really want a new bed and sheets.  And maybe a wall decoration of some sort.  BUT, i vowed to myself that I would NOT buy anything for my bedroom unless I could be a good steward of what I already have, hence my resolution.  I have to say, I would not give myself an A...maybe a low B, but not any higher.  However, I did do better than what I imagined I would.  My room is never really dirty...just messy.  I tend to six kids and all their stuff and clean the rest of the house, so I have always figured that if my room is at the bottom of the list that its ok.  I will continue on though with my resolution because I have liked sleeping in a neater space.  Also, it truly is the desire of my heart to care for what I have, so its good discipline.  And as for the bed and bedding...I'm currently taking donations.  Ha!

2011 Highlights...
--January snow days
--Reuben's 1st birthday
--Kids in sports--I love going to their games!! 
--Superb homeschool evaluations
--Planning trip to Peru for church kids (although it would be nice to actually GO on the trip with them!)
--Sibling Phish concert in Cincinatti
--DeLaney/Dobson visit (except for the poison ivy). 
--Taking my kids to Illinois for a week with cousins
--Spring and summer drives in the country
--Anniversary trip to Pittsburgh
--Kids enrolling and for the most part doing well in public school
--My garage sale--I love sitting in my garage chatting with people all day long
--Receiving word that Dustin's grievance was granted
--Birthday weekend celebration with friends in Oklahoma
--Planning and attending KayCee's wedding. (this is obviously the highlight of all highlights, but I am going in chronological order!!)
--Another year of no cavities for the Turner family
--Enrolling in college to (finally) finish school
--Mountaineer football games
--Holidays with my family and with Dustin's family

As far as 2012 goes, the only resolution that I can think of is that I will knit 100 dishrags.  That is not really anything spectacular, as I have done this before.  But, I've been out of the discipline of quieting myself to knit this year, so I will knit four rags a month and try to use up all my yarn.  I will not buy any more new yarn until I use what I have.  Oh...and you can almost guess what everyone will be getting for Christmas next year.