Reuben Matthias Turner
March 10, 2010
10 pounds 2 ounces
21 inches
I guess it was about a year ago now that Dustin and I thought that *maybe* we MIGHT want another baby. It was a BIG maybe. The details of the conversation are fuzzy, but the gist of it was that we were ok with just whatever would be. Six would be great, but we were more than content with our five. Fast forward to June. I think it was the third week of June that I got a positive pregnancy test! There's just nothing like seeing those two lines appear in the little window!! I was beyond excited and decided then to enjoy every second of the journey, being pretty sure it would be my final pregnancy and baby. I think it was sometime in the third week of July that I thought I would miscarry and went to the doctor. They did an ultrasound and found one perfect, little beating heart. But, my body was partly miscarrying and partly re-absorbing a twin. I had reason to rejoice and reason to cry, but overall I was so extremely thankful that this little babe was growing strong in my womb.
Fast forward again to the end of August. I hadn't been back to the doctor, but I knew that I was going to have to be making some choices as far as what type of prenatal care I would receive and where I would like to have the baby. I had been tossing around the idea of a homebirth for a year or so but wasn't totally sure. I met with a midwife and also went to see my former obsetrician in Clarksburg. I continued that way for most of my pregnancy. The midwife came to my house and we planned for a homebirth, but I continued to see the OB as well for monthly checkups and all routine tests.
The weeks of winter passed, and I became fairly confident that I would have the baby early--early to mid-February. All along I measured large for my dates, and the ultrasound had given me a due date of February 12th. At 36 weeks I had everything here at the house ready to go. All that was missing was the baby!! The first two weeks of February came and went. And finally, my original due date, the 28th, and the entire month of February had passed me by.
At this point, I was ready to retire to my bed in a mu-mu. There are not adequate words to describe how horrible I felt--beyond swollen, exhausted, sore, anxious, etc, etc. I had trouble recognizing myself and was becoming weary of the comments from people when I went out. "No baby yet?" "When's that baby comin'?" "You look miserable, honey.". Plus, little Reuben had a hard time getting settled head down in my pelvis, so the constant flipping and jabbing me was just out of control!
On Sunday, March 7th (at about a week overdue), my midwife called and told me that I would need to see the doctor ASAP for a non-stress test and ultrasound and then we would discuss what we were going to do. I went in the morning of March 9th with my mid-wife to see a doctor that she knew in Marietta. The non-stress test was great. The ultrasound was great. Except...they said baby would be 10.5-11.5 pounds! Yikes!! I had the feeling he was big, but I didn't think he was THAT big!
The news from the ultrasound filled me with all kinds of anxiety. If I was to continue with a homebirth it was with the knowledge that I was an hour from any hospital that could handle an emergency labor situation. I wanted to be 100% sure that I was confident enough to stay home. But, that type of assurity is really impossible naturally speaking, so I turned to Dustin to tell me what to do. And, of course, he said it was up to me.
All day we argued about it. I wanted to be told what to do, and he wanted me to do what was in my heart to do. We discussed and discussed and debated and debated, and finally at about 8:00 in the evening he suggested we pray. Why hadn't we thought of that before?? Prayer?? So, pray we did. And when we were done, Dustin said he really felt like he heard God speak to him...two words..."stay" or "go". I questioned that, "So, God's answer was 'stay' or 'go'?" To which Dustin, said "yes". And he said that he believed we would know the answer by the end of the night. My only response was "GREAT! Even God doesn't know what I'm supposed to do!!!"
Dustin left at around 9 for a meeting, and at some point after that I went to take my bath. I noticed as I began my bath that I felt really sick at my stomach. It wasn't contractions but rather constant pain in my stomach, and I felt really nauseous. A little while later, I called Dustin to come home from his meeting because I was afraid I'd get sick and pass out or something, and I didn't want to be alone.
When he got home, he asked if I was in labor. Of course I wasn't! But, he suggested we call the midwife because I was feeling so terrible. She arrived an hour or so later, and by this time, my abdominal pain has transitioned to contractions that were coming every 2-3 minutes. I was guessing at this point that I probably WAS in labor. The midwives hung around for awhile to see what was happening, and when I was in so much pain that I was no longer speaking, they decided they'd stick around. It was somewhere around this time that Dustin came to me and asked what I had decided about home vs. hospital. He said "so...are we going to stay or are we going to go?" And I knew instantly. I would stay. There was just no place else I'd rather be than right there at home with Dustin...in the peace and quiet of familiar surroundings...with my children tucked safely in their beds just down the hallway from me. So, the answer was, "STAY", and we knew by the end of the night. I guess God knew what he was saying afterall!
I continued to focus through each contraction for a couple hours. I sat mostly in my rocking chair in my room. I was calm most of the time, but I do remember feeling slightly anxious at some point and thinking that I couldn't take anymore. Keep in mind, I am NOT a night owl, so to be birthing a baby after midnight was not my cup of tea. I had always imagned a mid-morning birth!! The couple hours that I spend laboring is pretty much a blur. The contractions hit and didn't let up, and I just was doing my best to cope peacefully. I know someone propped my teddy bear up next to me and took pictures, and at some point I asked for my tooth bruth. If anything else strange happened, I don't remember.
At about 1:00 I got up to go to the bathroom. Standing at the sink, my water broke. My amniotic fluid was pretty dark with meconium, and the midwife just said "ok, we're going to push him out now." Shortly after came the urge to push. Problem was the floor was slippery!! I remember thinking that if someone didn't wipe the floor I was going to fall over!! So, they sat me on the birthing stool, and I was very determined to get the baby OUT! Within minutes, Reuben Matthias was born. Born into my arms in the middle of our bathroom.
It seems as if time just stood still. My senses came back, and I can recall every smell, sight, and feel of him. . I sensed the presence of God so strongly as breath filled Reuben's lungs and he began to cry. Here was the son we have prayed for. Here was a brother for Judah. We were never separated as he was born, cleaned off, and we re-located back into my bedroom.
At little while later, in the middle of the night, we woke the kids to come meet their new baby brother. The midwives checked and double-checked me and finally left. At around 4 in the morning, we settled in for a few hours of sleep.
The three weeks following Reuben's birth have been a blur! I can't believe how fast time has gone since his arrival. The days leading up to his birth were the longest, slowest days ever, and now I wish time would slow down! We are all just taken with him. He is scrumptious and gorgeous. I am a blessed mama of six, and I am sooo very very thankful that I had the opportunity to experience Reuben's birth in the way that I did. There isn't a second of it that I would change!
Oh...and his name...
Reuben Matthias. Reuben means "behold, a son". We figured that if we truly DID end up with a boy after all this time, the meaning would be so fitting. And his middle name, Matthias, means "gift of God". It has the same meaning as Judah's middle name, Nathanael. So, together his name means "behold, a son [who is a] gift of God". And its an added bonus that both of our sons' middle names have the same meaning! So, for all who have wondered...that is the story behind Reuben's name!
